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October 20, 2005
Streets of Paradise 
I am trying to stay focused. Trying. But my eye wanders to the "tray" on the desktop—is there a new piece of mail? And random thoughts send me to googling things. So I am not succeeding as much as I might like.
Two things, related, that I came across in my email (evil!) this morning. There was one of those "I'm moving to Portland soon" emails, which involve a sort of magical thinking that everything will just work out (I usedta get a fair amount of these when altportland was more prominent, and they always irritated the living hell out of me)—addressed to the bike listserv I'm on. Someone piped up welcoming the newcomer, mentioning that they were welcome but there was a Vehicle Immigration Tax on automobiles to the tune of 22%. In fact, some people call it the Catch-22.
I'm thinking that I need to add that as a prominent part of altportland.
Later in the thread that ensued (which I'm sure you can imagine), someone mentioned Illichville.
Why can't there be at least one city in America where Americans care enough to grow and prepare their own food? Why can't there be at least one car-free city in America? Why can't there be at least one place where artists don't have to fear being displaced by gentrification, farmers don't have to fear being displaced by suburban sprawl and craftspeople don't have to fear being undercut by sweatshop labor? Why can't there be at least one city where everyone, not just the affluent can afford to live the good life?Mind you, I know there's a reason that utopias don't exist, and I think of all the trouble Cheesepuppet went through to get out of a cohousing community that was endangering the health of her infant—honestly, I'm not that naïive. And maybe it's magical thinking that we could go back to some happier, healthier way of life. I still like the idea of it, though, even if it isn't possible.
—The Good Life
Also, Cheesepuppet read something about anxiety, and wrote about it that really resonated for me. Anxiety is about control, or the lack of it. But it's also about not having the confidence that you'll do the best you can do, and that things will be okay. Of course, there is always the chance that things won't be okay but there's absolutely nothing you can do about that, can you?
This is where Christian faith seems to be a problem-solver: you can believe that G-d has a purpose, and that this was meant to be, whatever this is. But, if you're not Christian, or not a believer at all, it's pretty hard to argue that this was meant to be. (Though I still do. I know, it's not logical.) And, well, no, I'm not going any further on religion.
Anyways. Trusting that you'll land on your feet. That's what I'm working on.
Posted at October 20, 2005
Comments
1. Are you serious about the tax thing? That's insane!
2. Cheesepuppet is the funniest damn name I ever heard.
Posted by: Jon in Michigan at October 20, 2005 5:57 PM
so...
are you a slow fat tri-athlete?
I am a big, beer bellied, mountainbiker.... who is moderately fast inspite of being 6'4" tall weighing in nearly 100 pounds more than most cyclists (235lbs)
it is all about Personal Best and the balance of life
for me at least
Posted by: gwadzilla at October 21, 2005 9:34 AM
Trusting that you'll land on your feet.....I like that. I really liked the quote about why can't there be one city that's carfree, or where people eat homegrown food? That's a big reason I'm okay with moving out to the relative boondocks: I get to live my values, or at least try, in an environment where it will be a lot easier to do. I'll be sacrificing some big city things that I know I'll miss, but I think it will be worth it.
I don't miss the irony in knowing that if I want to visit Seattle or Portland I'll need to use a car....
Posted by: cheesepuppet at October 21, 2005 11:04 PM