« better | Main | the art of being vulnerable »
April 17, 2007
momentarily calm 
As was clear from yesterday's entry, I had a full-fledged freakout yesterday. Today, the waters (at least those waters) are calm.
I don't need to label myself anything. I can get a salad almost anywhere. I just need to pick and choose my battles. Show some self-control on the meat and dairy and starch. I've shown before that I can.
It occured to me this am that all of this is not about labeling myself. This is my brain's sneaky way of saying "hey, the house is on fire, and you better do something quick, so maybe you should question your dedication to veganism". I can't really talk about what's going on at home right now, but suffice to say, I am stressed to the point of having no short-term memory, and thinking about it is so, well, distressing that I sort of shut down.
So I guess that it makes sense that I would just decide that yesterday was the day to make black and white decisions, state my allegiances, etc., rather than recognizing that I live in a grey world, and very little is really black or white.
Though, I've been reading about veganism and the whole argument against using wool. I'll be honest, I really thought it was silly. I understand when you make most types of silk, you kill the worms. But you don't kill sheep, right? Errrrr... Anyways, I think that I was wrong, and sooner or later, I'll see the errors of my ways.
This is when I wish I had this strong moral core that would say, of course I won't buy yarn for knitting again! Of course I won't thrift for wool and cashmere sweaters! But wool, damn, wool is just the greatest fiber: warm, stretchy, responsive. Of course, it probably does work best for the sheep.
I'm looking forward to some lentil soup and some salad tonight.
Posted at April 17, 2007
Comments
are you kidding? Now using wool is bad? I can't wait to hear the rationale behind this one. Don't listen to that rubbish, Athena. We NEED wool. Besides the obvious uses, if we didn't have wool, what would the moths eat? And if the moths starve, whoever's feeding on the moths will starve, and on and on it goes, up the food chain till pretty soon, no one has what they need. Has anyone asked the sheep how they're going to like it if we simply stop shearing them? They'll be forced to wear all the un-knitted sweaters of the world and they'll keep getting bigger and bigger till we have to build a separate barn for each sheep. Whoever thought up this idea isn't thinking ahead.
Posted by: kate at April 25, 2007 11:54 AM
hi vj, i've been a lurker for quite a while and i've loved reading about your twisty-turney journey, and i've gotta say that i went through a similar struggle recently about givin up the flesh. after this huge internal struggle, i finally came to the realization that the occasional bbq (when i'm back in the south- haven't found much in pdx that satisfies) or pork chop is not the problem. My problem was that meat was the headliner of my meals, and veggies were just condiments. So, I decided to follow Michael Pollan's advice and think of meat as the condiment instead. And that meat must come from a conscientious farm. And we're luckier in this town than a lot of folks in other parts of the country in that there are lots of those farms near us. So I now consider myself a conscientious omnivore- not as identifiable as 'vegan', but that kind of eating is doable for me. Anyway, sorry for the long post...but thanks for sharing your stories!
Posted by: Heather at April 25, 2007 7:06 PM
VJ, I saw a great salad recipe on Nigella Lawson's show a few weeks ago. It has been my go-to vegan salad and is really filling.
It's baby spinach, avocado, pepitas, and a lime dressing that is made with 2T olive oil, the juice and zest of 1 lime (or 2 if your limes aren't juicy), and 1/2tsp of salt. The dressing makes enough for about 3 big salads.
Posted by: Annalisa at May 1, 2007 6:18 AM